Toni Hargis
1 min readMar 18, 2021

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I'd just like to point out that if you were to be attacked, even if you'd taken self defence classes, there is no guaranteed reaction.

According to Rape Crisis (Scotland) -

“... the truth is that nobody knows how they or anyone else will react …it is very common for someone who is raped to respond quite differently to what we might expect. The way someone describes how they felt and what they did as an assault took place might surprise you and appear to be the opposite of what you thought. Many survivors describe freezing and feeling unable to move to escape, or to cry out or fight back, and this response is just as normal and natural as any other.”

The UK government’s Crown Prosecution Services states:

“Victims in a rape situation often become physically paralysed with terror or shock and are unable to move or fight.”

I point this out, not to be a Debbie Downer, but because many women berate themselves after any sexist event, whether it's a microaggression or the more 'serious stuff', when they don't react the way they thought they would. This often adds to the trauma.

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Toni Hargis
Toni Hargis

Written by Toni Hargis

Co-author of “How to Stand up to Sexism; Words for when enough is enough”. Helping women find their voices. @ToniHargis

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